Crosta D'Oro Hot Bread, Thornbury

Crosta D'Oro Hot Bread, Cnr High St & Clarendon St, Thornbury $4.80

Before eating this 1kg bohemian baguette I was nervous. I thought to myself, this could be possibly the best or worst pork roll my adventures have taken me on. I had to ponder the ingredients in silence. Does coleslaw belong in a pork roll? This very question was unfathomable until the moment those tongs clutched the creamy cabbage sabotage. It was a day of allowing unorthodox ingredients in the fill so I didn't question the pork princess's motives. I thought to myself it could be an easy mistake as she happily tonged at the ingredients with the speed only a pork roll princess could possess. I had a quick conversation about the 'gravy' she asked if I wanted. A rich tomato, stock, garlic and ginger reduction added a good zing that I was looking forward to, and the peanuts, I am always one for the peanuts. An odd combination that paid off in the end. Presentation was great with meat on top and bottom and double whammy of onion. I am a fan of this bohemian.

Bread 3/5
Salad 4/5
Meat 4/5
Chilli 3/5
Overall 8.5/10 experimental viet pigs

Ingredients: mayo, pat'e, 2 cold sliced meats, vietnamese gravy, soy sauce, coleslaw, spring onion, onion, pickled carrot, coriander, chilli, peanuts

T`s Vietnamese Classics - Preston Martket, Preston

T`s Vietamese Classics - Preston Market food court, Preston $4

Busy ass place rubbing elbows with all nationalities competing for a table, cheap meats, fruits and vegetables. Be prepared to push and shove your way around this place. It is a great market no doubt, I have always preferred this over Vic Market for its price and freshness so when I saw a Vietnamese takeaway opened up I was pretty excited. Specialising mostly in other Vietnamese cuisine like Pho or other rice and noodle dishes, I was here for one thing. A shame no cold cuts on offer but the BBQ`d pork more than suffices. I was aghast when the lady put lettuce in this shapely offering and was tempted to throw it straight at the ground and stomp on it, but everything else looked so tasty and the lettuce was only minimal. A good spooning of a sweet fish sauce sealed the deal for me, with chilli seeds and and carrot floating in the bowl, it forgave the lettuce and turned out to be a tasty number although the bread was a let down.

Bread 2.5/5
Salad 2/5
Meat 4/5
Chilli 4/5
Overall 7.5/10 Viet pigs swimming in fish sauce

Ingredients: lettuce :( pickled carrot, cucumber, coriander, spring onion, regular butter, BBQ pork, chilli, soy sauce, sweet fish sauce

Tina`s Hot Bread, Preston

Tina`s Hot Bread, High St Preston $3.50

Not bad work from young Tina but room for improvement. Soggy salads, good pat'e, good meat and bread was decent. A little to much raw onion for some but I was not complaining. Generous salt and pepper with a kick in face of chilli, this pork grenade was a real creeper. The thing with a creeper is it gets better and better towards the end, once all the sauce and juices have soaked down to the last bite of bread. Preston certainly has some Pork Roll establishments the community should be proud of.

Bread 3/5
Salad 3/5
Meat 4/5
Chilli 4.5/5
Overall 7.8/10 hard to find a car park viet pigs

Ingredients: Mayo, Pat'e, 3 cold sliced porks, pickled carrot, cucumber, coriander, raw onion, chilli, soy sauce, salt and pepper

Barkly Hot Bread, Brunswick

Barkly Hot Bread, 84-86 Sydney Rd, Brunswick $3.70

Another pork roll with street cred but does not deliver its promise. Given its locale I am not surprised of its reputation amongst the trendy folk who are after a touch of culture, I must say I was not entirely disappointed. Meatball is indeed a good touch but if the other ingredients lack in quality, then your overall points are going to drop.  I have been here a number of times and the level of customer service is always the same - lousy. Now let me point out that this is a good thing. I dont want to be your friend and I dont want a fake smile, I just want a tasty, tasty pork roll. You, and your bad attitude are going to give it to me, quickly. But dont even think about skimping on ingredients. Definitely lacking in mayo and pate'.

Bread 2/5

Salad 2/5

Meat 4/5

Chilli 3/5

Overall 6/10 viet pigs with attitude 

Ingredients: Mayo, pat'e, 3 different cold sliced pork, meatball, coriander, cucumber, pickled carrot, chilli, soy sauce

Mai Lan, Preston

Mai Lan, 435 High St, Preston $3.50

I have been going to this place for years and have never had a bad pork roll. When asked for chilli I usually say "just a little bit" and end up with a small piece at the start, nothing in the middle and a huge chunk right at the end and always fire hot. This particular time I simply said "yes" to the chilli and watched her throw in quite a few pieces and it made me fairly nervous, thinking this is going to ruin my meal. For some reason unknown to me, I could taste the chilli but it had no kick at all. Nothing. Everything else rated highly but I had to deduct points for the chilli.

Bread 4/5

Salad 4/5

Meat 4/5

Chilli 2/5

Overall 7.5/10 regular customer viet pigs

Ingredients: Mayo, Pat'e, 4 different cold meats, pickled carrot w/ raddish, cucumber, coriander, spring onion, brown onion, chilli, soy sauce 

N.Lee, Collingwood

N.Lee 220 Smith St, Collingwood $4

A tasty pork roll no doubt about that, but unfortunately the street cred far outweighs the true substance of this one. I probably was not wearing enough op-shop clothes to get the nod of approval from the pork roll team at N.Lee but this visit was strictly business. It is a neat and efficient but westernised hot bread bakery that has lost its true sense of home. Bread was soft and chewy like a McDonalds bun and focused more on the mayo and pat'e as the centre of attention. Although it had excellent salad, Ho Chi Minh would be disappointed.

Bread 1/5
Salad 5/5
Meat 2/5
Chilli 2/5
Overall 5.5/10 raybanh wearing viet pigs on fixed gear bicycles

Ingredients: Mayo, Pat'e, 2 types cold sliced pork, pickled carrot, cucumber, coriander, brown onion, chilli, soy sauce

N'Joy Cafe, Pascoe Vale

N'Joy Cafe, 86 Cumberland Rd Pascoe Vale       $5

Neat little friendly cafe, well rounded tasty pork roll with meat balls as an added deliciousness (special Vietnamese sauce was a nice touch as well) salad was packed with coriander which created a very fresh taste but unfortunately the chilli didn't pack much punch and the price is on the high side!

Bread: 2/5
Salad: 3/5
Meat: 3/5
Chilli: 2/5

Overall 6/10 Viet Pigglets

Ingredients: Vietnamese style mayo, Pate', x2 ham style pork, Meatball, Coriander, pickled carrot, cucumber, special sauce, chilli

T&D Hot Bread, Glenroy

T&D Hot Bread, 814 Pascoe Vale Road, Glenroy


Excellent crunchy bread that shatters when bitten. Fried shallots where good touch with soy sauce and Vietnamese BBQ sauce combo a bonus. Unfortunately the BBQ pork was microwaved and the spring onion not so fresh. A bit shy on the chilli for my liking also. Nevertheless an all round tasty pork roll.
For a side dish or extra try out the 'Vietnamese sausage roll' a small round pastry filled with pork mince.

BREAD: 4/5
SALAD: 2/5
MEAT: 2/5

OVERALL 6/10